Have you ever done something to push your boundaries and later regretted it?
I did that the night before last.
I was debating whether or not to share a “song sketch” on Facebook. I did a post about it and felt encouraged by a few friends. So… I did. I shared a recording of a song that is very raw. That was recorded on an iPhone in my living room. The vocals were off-key.
And after I shared it… crickets. No comments. A few likes (pretty sure they liked that I was pushing my boundaries, not the recording of the song.)
I started freaking out. Crying. Filled with regret. All sorts of thoughts started spiraling thorough my mind.
“Just delete it.”
“If you delete it, people with think you are a chicken shit.
“I don’t want to share any more songs with anyone ever again.”
“I just want to hide in a cave.”
And I realized as much as I like to tell myself that I don’t care what other people think, I really do. It does matter to me.
I also realized that being vulnerable can be a scary thing. A very scary thing. To open oneself up in raw form in a public post that anyone can see can be very intimidating. It can cause all sorts of unexpected emotions to surface. It can cause a questioning of how vulnerable is too vulnerable.
It also made me realize that maybe people aren’t comfortable with giving feedback on something they don’t really like. And maybe it isn’t a good idea to share something “not ready for prime time” with the entire world.
What are your thoughts on this? Have you ever “put yourself out there”, pushed your boundaries, gone past your comfort zone… and experienced emotions you weren’t expecting?